Rhinoplasty

I think the dumb people of America hate the smart people far more than the outnumbered smart people hate the dumb people.

I walk this planet and look up at really high buildings that have been there for decades.  Sometimes I worry that the really tall buildings will reverse the laws of gravity.  They’re so high and onerous.  Huge and technologically threatening. I now live and work in buildings with three elevators each.  People still look down in the elevator but now have smart phones to actually look at. Allegedly fresh produce everywhere.  Fresh bread on the shelves.  Freeways.  Cars.  Buses. Trains.  Airplanes.  Appliances.  But then. Sidewalks buckle hilariously, many Americans cling to God and guns and fear that Muslims may be living in their midst.

Still, it occurs to me there are smart folks.

And we’re ensconced in selecting a leader for our people.

The fulcrum of the sale never rests on reason but always reclines on romance.

It’s true.

It’s everyone’s problem everyday.  No one can escape it.  We buy according to emotional jackwagonry.  Whether it’s a saddle and bullets or a yellow goddamn Ferarri.  Outside of groceries and telecommunication bundling, we buy to feel better about ourselves.  We want to believe we’ve gotten the best deal and oh by the way isn’t it beautiful?  It’s gold plated with precious gems and very functional.

This is how we prosecute the election of a man who will be hugely consequential, far beyond just the face of America to the rest of the world.

And we are tied.  The starkest contrast between candidates in a decade, maybe a generation.  And we can’t figure it the fuck out.  Tied between a perpetually grinning used car salesman and a constitutional scholar.  A guy who’s religion requires  vestments in the form of magic underwear.  A man who championed the Vietnam war with zeal while earnestly avoiding participation therein by hiding in the folds of his bullshit cult/religion while galavanting around France on a bicycle in shirtsleeves and tie, spreading the good word of a fucking lunatic.  His god lives on a different planet you know.  Scientists don’t know anything about it.  I think his religion is fair game because anyone who believes in a Santa in the sky should be subject to scrutiny.  They all gush about faith. It’s always embarrassing.  Jesus Christ.  Pun intended.    I loathe religion.  I would abscond religion in politics in a second but at least I get to make fun of it.

Obama has Colin Powell and Bill Clinton and Romney has Meatloaf and Ted Nugent.

I can’t believe it’s a contest.

I’m no Obamabot or Obamanot or whatever.  I just can’t bring myself to care about that shit.  The idea that we’re either liberal or conservative, Democrat or Republican.  It’s an indicator of just where we are.  Banks and financial institutions have had no better friend than Obama.  Unemployment remains over seven point eight percent while the stock market has doubled and not one of the bastards that screwed us is even sweating indictment much less a club fed vacation.  What I am is progressive and cynical. You don’t know cynical until your forties.  That’s when you begin to understand that most American voters don’t give a mad fuck about truth and justice, but instead are dying to be sold something. To buy something to make them feel better.  All so willing to stand in line for the proverbial bill of goods both men have ready.  They both lie and I’m sick of that.  I can’t stand it so much that it makes me think about it and feel bad whenever I lie.

My cynicism is not merely informed but rocket fueled by the bellicose ferocity the entire Republican party has dedicated itself to.  One astonishingly slow and short term thinking goal.  The destruction of a sitting American President.  I have never witnessed such hatred.  They have pursued it with a velocity that goes beyond flirting with financial collapse to a whole new low of courting the dissolution of the American middle class with such casual ease and aplomb that I am terrified.  I’m confident these people don’t give a mad fuck about you.

And yes, race has reared it’s ugly head.  I overheard someone say something like “sometimes Obama acts like a black man and sometimes he acts like a nigger”.  What the fuck does that mean?  If anything like that has ever escaped your lips, then you my friend are a racist goddamn pig and your only excuse is we live in a society that just might countenance such a remark without you getting punched hard in the mouth on the spot.  Like right below and between the eyes, above the mouth but just below the bridge of the nose.

Romney lies more.  A lot more and that’s why I don’t like him.  He’s a seasoned obfuscater.  It bothers me how good he is at it.  He lies without any physical strain.  Like a rug.  Although when he gets called on it, he winces in a way that makes me think he shat himself.  I just don’t get this guy.  Everytime he’s in front of a camera he’s nervous and weird and saying something completely different than the last time I saw him.  All politicians are full of shit but this guy is a world champion sociopath hypocrite, with role reversals on everything from health care to war and women.  A most accomplished purveyor of both simple and elaborate falsehoods.  A shameless sweaty liar.

His latest ad in Ohio proselytizing that he had nothing but good intentions for the auto industry and Obama was and is hell bent on it’s destruction.  That as a result of the stimulus for the American auto industry, Jeep was sold to the Italians and now they plan to ship thousands of manufacturing jobs to China.  Grand Pooh Bahs of both companies issued statements effectively demonstrating Romney as blind shithouse drunk or lying.  The ad was a lie.  Nothing about it is true.  Mittens has demonstrated over and over that he is willing to say anything, anything at all, counter to what he said just the day before, to get elected.  Wouldn’t even answer questions about FEMA while pretending not to campaign in Ohio.  While pretending to load donated goods donated by Ohioans purchased by his own campaign staffers.  Willard Mittens Romney is the biggest fucking liar to ever run for president of the United States of America.

If he gets elected, which version are we gonna get?  The moderate who got elected in Massachusetts?  The one who invented Obamacare?  The self described  “severe conservative” who won the clown car contest of the Republican primary this year by being more disingenuous than any of the rest of the crazies?  The suddenly renewed moderate robot Romney who showed up in the last two debates?  Or the absolute dick that selected an absolute dick like Ryan to win over all those absolute neo-dick Republicans who weren’t buying in to his absolute dick, don’t raise taxes on the the severely dickish rich fucks who control our country?  Which one?

Seriously?  Who the fuck is this guy and have you ever seen ambition without conviction so naked?

Still, it’s a contest.  Dead even in the polls.

Paralysis of analysis doesn’t begin to explain it.  Why is this happening?  One guy doesn’t suck but the other one is a natural disaster who belongs to a cult that really does believe in magic underwear and that is the sum total of what he believes in as far as we are able to deduce based on what he says between Tuesday and Wednesday.  Obama isn’t the second coming but this guy Romney keeps changing wigs, tilting his head and smiling in the same creepy way while reversing every single reasonable position he’s ever taken on anything at all to do with compassion or common sense.  I’ve never struggled with this decision.  His only consistency is in saying what he thinks might just make him electable over and over again. Over and over again.  Whatever he has to say.

He runs on magic that doesn’t exist and half of us are line for a ticket.

It really sucks that we are in this place.  I am disgusted.  This polarization, this divide that exists only on paper and not in the real world is proof that the grand distraction is working.  We are mesmerized.  The whole thing is working all too well.  The plutocrats and oligarchs waltz through our intestines and dance on our fracturing skulls.  Distraction has become our satisfaction.  It is working all too well.  As long as we are at each others throats we will continue to lose ourselves and our identity as Americans, our identity as one America.  A singular country.  Pride without prejudice.

We are all the same and always have been.

Instead we battle each other with a violence that just doesn’t belong.  I talk to conservatives everyday and at conversation’s end discover that we agree on most of it.  There is no “there” there.  Most of us are reasonable people no matter which side we’re on.  Am I the only one that knows this?

I lament the absence of a viable third political party in America.  In particular, I am profoundly disappointed in the Republican party’s inability to produce any serious and rational candidates for president going all the way back to the last decent and honorable Republican president.  Dwight D. Eisenhower.  America so desperately needs a sane and reasonable Republican party but has gotten nothing but partisan, demagogging losers for the last twelve years.  The only third party to enter stage left is the abominable Tea Party.  Give me a fucking break.  Gutter slash Rovian politics that are more about the lowest common denominator than anything else.  Money.  Money.  Money.  They have too much and those that fall in line don’t have shit and never will if only because they dance with who the one brung them.  I can’t help but hate that there is now but one relatively sane man standing between us and bat shit crazy policies and the intended consequences; incumbent president Obama.

Having said all that, what is up with the overtly pernicious voter suppression effort at the behest of all the Republican secretaries of state and governors in the swing states?  People in Florida and Ohio waiting eight hours or more to vote early.  It’s constitutionally mandated that we’re all allowed to vote in national election isn’t it?  Can we get Rick Scott on the phone?  I want to ask him what the hell is he so afraid of.  Democrats are proactive.  They like to get it done and out of the way.  And they’re lazy-more likely to get shit done on their own time.  Many of them are frustrated poor and really need to vote on the weekends, like after church.  Godluvem. The people who wait in these lines with indefatigable determination are heroes. They can bring their kids if they have to.  Former Republican governor of Florida Charlie Crist calls bullshit on it.  He says it’s voter suppression.  All I know is I see the the lines on the TV and there aren’t many white faces. They are afraid of the general population.  Scared enough of the people to rig elections.  What more can I make clear to you?

If you are still confused, I would invite you to piss up a rope.

If Mitt gets elected, we so deserve it.

Drinks for my friends.

 

 

4 Responses to “Rhinoplasty”

  • Pamela Veselinovic:

    You’re right, Mike. It is very scary that half the country believes in Mitt Romney & can’t understand how the deficit was formed in the first place, never mind how we might fix it. I actually resigned from my job because I knew I wouldn’t be able to hold my tongue during this election, as I spent the last horrific year stuck in a small office with 2 right-wing bitches who were both my superiors, and never passed up an opportunity to bash Obama when I was around, calling him an idiot & lashing at me verbally for supporting him. There was such hatred between one “woman” & me that I have no doubt my employment would have ended with me being led out in handcuffs had I stayed there through this election. Staying home hasn’t been easy, either, thanks to email. I actually had a conversation with a union bartender in Vegas who said he’s voting for Romney because he believes all government offices should be closed, except the treasury & defense. “We can’t take care of everyone in this country,” he said. This is a guy who has been collecting wads of cash from a union job – an unattractive 50-something man the casino owners would have loved to have replaced with a younger, hotter employee willing to work for 1/4 of the hourly wage – years ago – but he’s too stupid to see that his job is at risk too, when Romney passes a Federal right-to-work law. And like you, I almost want to see that happen. Just so I can picture him standing in a long line at the bartenders union, asking what the heck happened. It would almost be worth it. Almost.

  • reiyalight:

    WHAAAAAAATTTT ….ARE YOU DOING WAY UP THERE IN A OBSCENELY HIGH BUILDING? I’M CONFUSED AS TO WHY YOUR NOT BEING PUBLISHED IN PLAYBOY MAGAZINE, OR AT LEAST DOING A JAMES BOND 007 FLICK? YOU STILL SUPERFLY?
    YEAH,AMERICANS WE STILL DOPE’S YET WITH AN INFUSION FROM SUPER OXYGENATED BLOOD THERE’Z HOPE.
    I ALREADY KNEW, ROMNEY WASN’T GOING TO BE ABLE TO PULL, HIS PLASTIC ACT ON,THE MAJORITY OF US. YOU WOULD THINK MOST AMERICANS GET THE IDEA, OF “SEPERATION OF CHURCH AND STATE”, YET SO MUCH OF THE REPUBLICAN MIND SET IS RIGHT WING CHRISTIAN. IN MY RELIGION LUV TRUMPS, THE COMMON LAW’S OF MAN…SO GAYS’ ARE WELCOMED TO MARRY. WE ALSO ARE TAUGHT AS IS IN THE CHRISTIAN BIBLE, GOD BREATHED, LIFE INTO MAN. WHERE WE DON’T CONSIDER AN UNBORN FEATUS, TO HAVE LIFE, UNTIL BREATH. HOWEVER I THINK I CAN SPEAK FOR MANY OF MY FELLOW SPIRITUAL FOLLOWERS; EARLY STAGE ABORTION, IS A MEDICAL PROCEDURE YET, AT SOME POINT IT IS SOMEWHAT CRUEL, AND NOT DESIRABLE TO ABORT A FULL TERM FETUS.
    FOR ME GOD, LIVES IN THE SOUL, GOD ISN’T A WHITE MAN, GOD IS SIMPLY PULSATING CREATIVE FORCE, OF LOVE. YET, WE IDIOT HUMANS GET DESTRACTED BY OUR OWN DILLUSIONAL IMPISH NEED FOR POWER, AND CONTROL.
    ON ANOTHER SUBJECT, I WAS ALSO CONVINCED THAT THE S.F. GIANTS WOULD WIN THE PLAYOFFS, ONLY BECAUSE, THEY AVAIL THEMSELVES TO STATE OF THE ART; SUPER ATHELETIC TRAINING STANDARDS. STILL THOUGH I LOVE, THE PLACE OF MY BIRTH DETROIT. I BEEN DOING YOGA, I STRETCH MY CHIN UP TOWARDS THE SKY, AND LOVE LOOKING UP AT CLOUDS, SKY SCRAPPERS, & HIGH PEOPLE. AND ALSO, REALLY SMART INDIVIDUALS SUCH AS YOURSELF. WHY PEOPLE SPEND SO MUCH ENGERGY DIGGING AROUND IN THE DIRT, FOR POWER OVER OTHERS IS BEYOND ME. MAY LIBERTY REIGN FOR ANOTHER 4 YEARS…AND NO MO WAR’S!!!

  • David Hornbeck:

    “I walk this planet and look up at really high buildings that have been there for decades. Sometimes I worry that the really tall buildings will reverse the laws of gravity. They’re so high and onerous. Huge and technologically threatening.”

    … might you feel like this because physics took the day off on 9/11/01?

    “It’s everyone’s problem everyday. No one can escape it. We buy according to emotional jackwagonry. Whether it’s a saddle and bullets or a yellow goddamn Ferarri. Outside of groceries and telecommunication bundling, we buy to feel better about ourselves. We want to believe we’ve gotten the best deal and oh by the way isn’t it beautiful? It’s gold plated with precious gems and very functional.”

    .. Lennon told us in 1967, “All you need is love, love is all you need” are we maybe ready to listen to this message yet?

    “If Mitt gets elected, we so deserve it.”

    … thankfully that didn’t happen & the short-bus contingent of GOP asshattery & religious whackjobs are firmly left back in 1952 where they belong. That said, I really WISH, the few sane, intelligent members of that “party” would kindly bitchslap their retarded brethren.

    My only un-liked outcome of this election? We might never get to see the Southpark episode that was made in case he DID win. Maybe on blue ray next year… “the waiting is the hardest part”

  • Michael Douglass:

    Yo, Helmet

    Thanks. Point well taken. Physics took the day off on WTC 7.

    What I really want to drive home is this: The fulcrum of the sale never rests on reason but always reclines on romance.

    That and they are still here. They have yet to leave the building.

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