The Pantsuit gets cock blocked

So yeah, Hillary takes a steamer on our man Obama’s forehead last night with the help and complicity of just about every toothless hillbilly in West Virginia. It was an ass whooping for sure, albeit by a demographic for whom the most common and prominent skill might just be the ability to play the banjo or make Ned Beatty squeal like a pig.

My point is this. West Virginians do not by any means, represent white America.

Despite all this, it’s too bad she’s unable to revel in the best bowel movement she’s had in months, even for a single twenty four hour news cycle.

Ya’ll know I likes me some John Edwards. I damn near did the potty dance when he arrived on a white horse in Michigian today to endorse our man Barack. In the words of that famous philosopher and arbiter of contemporary zeitgeist Bart Simpson, Ha Ha!

So much for testicular fortitude, huh Hills? As a male, I have a grasp on just how disastrously uh, moist, the concept of pissing in the wind could be. I can only imagine that for a woman, the potential for a soaking increases exponentially.

How long does she intend to flirt with such an obvious calamity?

I reclined sanguine in Yuma Arizona last night with my parents, we mused about the possibility of the Pantsuit as a running mate while sipping Turley zinfandel in a motorhome far nicer than my apartment. I took the opportunity to posit again that I thought that was precisely what she was up to and floated the idea of Edwards, despite his overt statements to the contrary.

That’s what they all say, I observed.

My mother is quick and sharp. She said he’d be a dream Attorney General. Damn she got me.

After the twin turbo charged disaster that was Gonzales and Ashcroft, and the current trainwreck of Michael Mukasey, who’s unable to wrap his brain around waterboarding, Edwards would be far more than a breath of pristine atmosphere. He’d be a sustained gust powerful enough to scour our constitution of all the shit the Republicans have spent the last seven years smearing on it.

A crusader against corporate influence as the Attorney General of The United States? Awesome.

Brilliant brinksmanship. Talk about a counterpunch.

In related news: Travis Childers visited a whooping in Missafuckingssippi while facing a full frontal assault from the evil blackhat Republicans wielding their most racist broadsword. He may be a bit of a nut but BOOYA MOTHERFUCKERS!

Drinks for my friends.

3 Responses to “The Pantsuit gets cock blocked”

  • Ahhhhhh……I love the smell of whupass in the morning!
    When I saw that John Edwards endorsement, I nearly spit out my beer in astonishment. The thing about Pantsuit winning WV….Obama knew he wasn’t going to win….so far the states that his strategist has predicted he win have mostly been pretty darn accurate.
    …and Hillary is saying she should be the nominee simply because she’s winning the swing states…uh…hello?!?!? You have to win the OTHER states too…*cough* *cough*. If the nomination was based on who won the swing states then she’d be a shoo in.
    I think because of all that bravado in the beginning…her being the supposed “inevitable” Democratic nominee…is biting her in the ass…and swinging her around like a ragdoll. Heavy is the head that wears the crown of shit.

  • crazy like a fox:

    Passive aggressive are some of the most powerful people that I know. Lol Edwards, did an eloquently timed passive move.

  • mad_man:

    The warwhore’s judgment failed her when it actually mattered to the country. Now we’re stuck in Iraq.

    President Barack Hussein Obama. I really, really like the sound of that.

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