Haiti rhymes with fucked.

Nine million people.  At least a third in serious trouble.  Pitifully poor country.  These people were miserable before this happened.

Big surprise.  They’re fucking Catholics.  They believe in God.  Spell check compels me to capitalize them and it.

I’m in a bad mood so I just want to point this out.  The Vatican could sell a painting or two and pay for the incredible gathering of forces converging on this microscopic nation to save as many lives as possible.  It’s kind of amazing the relief effort being mounted.  Specialist teams from a dozen countries with dogs and literally tons of equipment and supplies.  Various militaries steaming toward.

I’m thinking this is gonna be horrifying but kinda dramatic.

Anybody heard from the Pope?  I’m sure he had something to say.  Anybody?

Meanwhile Limbaugh the Human Shitsmear and Pat “I wish God would fuck him in the neck” Robertson both busted a nut today.

Robertson: “Something happened a long time ago in Haiti, and people might not want to talk about. [Haitians] were under the heel of the French…and they got together and swore a pact to the Devil. They said, ‘we will serve you if you’ll get us free from the French.’ True story. And the Devil said, ‘OK it’s a deal.’ Ever since, they have been cursed by one thing after another.”  -collegenews.com

“On his radio program Wednesday morning, Rusty [Limbaugh] said that President Barack Obama and company would use Haiti to get closer to the “light-skinned and dark-skinned black [communities] in this country” while adding that the U.S. has “already donated to Haiti. It’s called the U.S. income tax.”  -collegenews.com

Al Franken wrote a book once called “Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Idiot”.  It was all true.

Shitsmear then endeavored to compare Obama’s reaction to the Fruit of the Boom bomber to what he’s doing for the people of Haiti.  Huge mistake to measure your response about a man who failed to ignite his underwear on a commercial airliner.  A man who’s in custody and no longer a threat to anyone.  A man who may know things above and beyond how to detonate his fucking diaper or not……………..

But shame on you for acting so quickly when three million people are in real trouble right now.

Man I hate these guys.  Robertson blames everything on the Devil and Fags.  Limbaugh blames everything on everyone smarter than him.  I hear the latest thing is three dimensions.  Math check.

This shit is killing me.  I gotta bug out.

I mean really.

Let me say this: These guys are dicks.  They really have nothing to do with any of us.  Filthy rich whores who have opted to trade soul at the crossroads quite some time ago.  Notice how large their heads are.  How the noggin seems to float above the torso and shoulders like a balloon, bobbing and jerking to the random currents of air.

Think of others who appear this way.  Discuss.

Drinks for my friends.

35 Responses to “Haiti rhymes with fucked.”

  • Lara Riscol:

    thanks for the pull no punches post. look forward to more.

  • Nina Womack:

    Hilariously true commentary!

  • Andi Shechter:

    Thanks for your anger. You said it as well as I’ve wanted to. Thanks especially for the accurate ” Limbaugh blames everything on everyone smarter than him.” The image brought to mind is that he’s wallowing in his playpen so excited that all the grown-ups are staring at him. He compared one person to the death and devastation of an entire country. Initial numbers of dead estimated at 100,000. That’s ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND dead people. Including an Archbishop, dozens of staffers of humanitarian including 36 UN mission peacekeepers and others. But diaperman was more scary. Eu, let’s not go there.

    Thanks.

    Fuckin ICELAND sent a search and rescue team. FAIRFAX COUNTY, Virginia was also one of the first on the ground with aid. LOOK at these amazing people and then wonder.

  • admin:

    @Lara:
    You’re welcome. It’s what I do.

  • admin:

    @Nina:
    Thanks for reading and commenting.

  • admin:

    @Andi:
    Thanks. Let us join together in loathing the Limbaughs of the world.

  • irishmafia:

    So lets get this straight other than the moral and humanatarian point of view We’ve poured billions of dollars of taxpayer money into this country over decades for a place with no economic,military,or cultural use to us. Now we will pour billions more of our sparse taxpayer dollars to help them once again. Why? Why us? Why not China Russia Saudia Arabia India Japahn Germany France Brazil taking the lead and let us be an also ran like they are now? For decades and decades the rest of the world hates us but expects us to bail them out when in need and then still hate us. Haiti is just an example. Take care of Us first!

  • admin:

    For what it’s worth, many of the states you mention are participating. China for example. This thing is pretty multilateral.

    Iceland put a pony in it. Some of these countries are there to help and to learn. They are sincere because they want to know what to do for their own people when and if the time comes.

    It’s golden all around.

    Anybody heard from the fucking pope yet?

    Understand the scale of this tragedy. The world needs to participate and it is. It’s not just us.

    Ask yourself why the world hates us. I will give it to you in one word. Unilateral.

    Drinks for my friends.

  • jon holmes:

    I just farted so loudly the windows shook.

  • Poster:

    They are NOT Catholics. On the surface they are, but that’s not what they practice. They practice the ancient spirit religion of Voo Doo. They have continued this practice since the time of their ancestors who were brought as slaves. Voo Doo is their soul belief and religion, NOT Catholicism, not true Catholicism.

  • admin:

    @Jon:
    Good for you. Don’t just share this with us, call somebody.

  • Martha:

    Our country is in economic crisis. We had to borrow money from China! Yet, Obama is donating $100 Million!!!!! That is ridiculous. If I am so broke, that I need to humiliate myself and borrow money from a friend, why would I donate to strangers and where would the money come from? Even after I got my finances together, if I were to donate, I’d take care of my own first. Haiti doesn’t do anything for us. It is not 1950. It’s 2010 and the US is facing financial challenges. Obama pulled this $100 Million from where? Why doesn’t reach in his and Michelle’s bank account? We can’t afford this!! Why doesn’t the United Arab Emrates and other rich parts of the world help out Haiti. China donated very little, and I don’t blame them. $100 Million!! Obama must be insane. We are not responsible for the world’s disasters.

  • Anonymous Poster:

    I agree with Irishmafia 100%.

  • admin:

    @Poster:
    I’m pretty sure that Catholicism is Voodoo. I’m pretty sure too many of them are horrible hypocritical pedophile pieces of shit. The only thing your average priest believes in is the chaos that allows him to do whatever the fuck he wants as long as his flock brings the coin.

    The Devil has a backstage pass, box seats and a key to every bus, hotel and castle the Catholic Church owns.

    Anybody heard from the pope yet?

  • Martha:

    Our country is in economic crisis. We had to borrow money from China! Yet, Obama is donating $100 Million!!!!! That is ridiculous!!. If I am so broke, that I need to humiliate myself and borrow money from a friend, why would I donate to strangers and where would the money come from? Even after I got my finances together, if I were to donate, I’d take care of my own first. Haiti doesn’t do anything for us!!! It is not 1950. It’s 2010 and the US is facing financial challenges. Obama pulled this $100 Million from where? His ass? Why doesn’t he reach in his and Michelle’s bank account? We can’t afford this!! Why doesn’t the United Arab Emrates and other rich parts of the world help out Haiti? China donated very little, and I don’t blame them. $100 Million!! Obama must be insane. We are not responsible for the world’s disasters. If we stepped back just once, other countries would have to help, and if not oh well.

  • admin:

    Word to Martha. When you repeat yourself, I wince.

  • Bebe:

    Yeah, china “contributed” – all of one million $. Why not tell the *whole* story asshole? Because it would show the flaws in your “narrative”. If people want to *donate* they can and should. I do. But keep our fucking gubmint OUT of it.

  • Master Bacon:

    It’s almost too awful to imagine. Any curse on Haiti is written in French. Any curse on Pat Robertson is welcome.

  • brownie:

    soooo… Should if i hopped on a plane to Haiti, and then stuck my hand out… I might be able to finally pay my bills ? Wonder who will come to our rescue… when, say.. half of California slips into the sea….

  • Red Five:

    @ brownie: So you would prefer it if we left an entire country to rot? I love it when people rail against foreign aid while screaming for a handout in the same breath. You probably have more change in your couch cushions than a lot of Haitians see in wages for a week.

  • admin:

    @Bebe:
    What’s your gripe? Who stole the prize out of your cereal? Our “gubmint” remains one of the only entities able to provide real help to these destitute people. We have a history of such. It’s one of the reasons America was once respected and appreciated. Put yourself in their shoes and shut up.

  • admin:

    @Master Bacon:
    Hear ye, hear ye!

  • admin:

    @brownie:
    Yeah, go to Haiti and stick your ignorant fucking hand out. I’ll buy your goddamn ticket and wish you good luck with a shit eating grin. And for what it’s worth, California isn’t going to slip into the sea.

    Were that to happen, it would be your fellow countrymen risking their lives to save you. Piss up a rope.

  • admin:

    @Red Five
    Thank you 🙂 Keep reading. There’s lots here.

  • Miss Fitz:

    “But keep our fucking gubmint OUT of it”

    Our gubmint stages coups in Haiti, hmmm, wonder why that is, and who paid their salaries, and whom objected to the coups? Any money left in the Haitian national bank, the contents of which were to pay for infrustucture repair? T’anks, Reagan, Senior and Junior Bush, the drinks and the laughs were on us. And Haiti.

  • Ken:

    Some things need to transcend politics and ideological positions…this is one of them. You do not have to be social liberal to want to participate-you need to be a human being.
    Even Sports Illustrated posted an article telling irate Tennessee fans to put their anger in perspective in the face of this horrible tragedy and showed a link to a man crying at the central morgue after he found his wife and baby daughter in the pile of corpses stacked outside. Does it matter that this man was Catholic or not? Does it matter if he sticks pins in a doll from a ritual that predates Christianity? I think what matters is that he went to work one day and came home to this.
    And for those of you in need of a history lesson, the Monroe Doctrine was one of the critical pieces of foreign policy that helped define our country and establish our worldwide economic power. some would say we need to go back to exerting our influence over our own hemisphere first…

  • Lashawndra:

    This whole thing is Bushs fault. Why didnt he fix the bildings codes for 8 years instead of drilling oilwells.

  • Msss...T:

    Christianinty in itself indeed is VooDoo! They pray jointly to bend the pure light of God as it enters the lower universe’s to their own wants and needs. Thus going against Gods will. They create false idols.

  • admin:

    @Miss Fitz:
    Whenever the Bush’s are involved,the laugh is always on us. Thanks for reading.

  • admin:

    @Ken:
    Religion shouldn’t and doesn’t matter, that’s my point. Thanks for reading and contributing.

  • admin:

    @Lashawndra:
    I’m not sure it’s Dumbya’s fault but he is guilty of being an ignorant asshole.

  • admin:

    @Msss…T:
    They presume to know God better than the rest of us. Huge mistake. Hubris and ignorance.

  • David Lee 3:

    Lord please,.. Goddamn organized religion.

    Good post.

  • admin:

    Thanks man.

  • Misty:

    Yeah, and I’m practically a virgin! Martha Sheez what a wench; do ya toss the baby out cause it cuts a little gas, as you change it’s diapers? Most people have been down, and out at one time in their life or another. I’ve never had concrete laying on top of me, for a week, going without food and water. Water, Bitch! Martha stop the whinning, yo Ho!
    Our country is in an financial crises, because Americans are easily marketed to. “Here let me give you a $500.00 dollar loan, and who cares if you have any documentation of employment.” Yes that did happen! Lets not forget you would rather have a top of the line $350.00 cell phone, and a gazillion t.v. channels enstead of putting your money into the bank.
    Haitians are our neighbors, if we can pump up all these other nations throughout History, we can keep our neighbors friendly, and develop a buisness relationship with them. What do you want to let the Russians, or Chinease send military aid? I suspect the millions donated by the U.S. includes the salaries of our military to help stabalize, and rebuild. Martha get real or get lost!

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